Use the good dishes! You may not have fine china, but maybe you have some other kind of nice plates that you only use on special occasions. Perhaps those plates, and maybe glassware and silverware, remain safely packed away in their original boxes, or high up in your curio or kitchen cabinet. The point is, we tend to keep our nicest dishes safely tucked away and on call for special occasions that may or may not ever come. Our best pieces may be languishing unused as we too often default to the ease and familiarity of plastic or paper plates.
This is not sponsored content from the fine china lobby. This is a wakeup call to live life right now. Using your good dishes is a metaphor for living life more fully and being in the moment. This is also about self-care, which is always important and even more so now as we collectively suffer through the pandemic, social unrest, general acrimony, and a troubled economy. How can we practice better self-care without spending much money?
Use your good stuff: I would rarely shop at high-end department stores, but a few years back I came across this beautiful, one-button, dark men’s suit at Saks – it was expensive, but on sale and it was beautiful. I had it tailored and when I wore it, I felt like I was “the stuff.” The thing is, I would not wear it often. It sat in a nice suit bag protected from the sun, dust, moths etc. A lot of big events would come and go, but rarely did they seem important enough for me to pull out my Giorgio Armani. Finally, I attended a special event with my Armani, and to my chagrin the younger guys had the slimmer suit styles, and there I was with the baggy pleated pants, full shoulders, and full jacket suit, looking like I had just arrived through a time machine from 10 years prior. It hit me that I never got to enjoy the suit I coveted so much. After that, when I wore it, I felt dated and severely behind the fashion times. Use your good stuff – your plates, your clothing before it goes out of style, your watch or other jewelry, the $100 bottle of wine, and so on.
Walk: Get outdoors, look up at a blue sky or a star-filled night, take long deep breaths – just 15 minutes can do wonders for your mental and physical well-being.
Volunteer: The great irony here is that you tend to get more benefit when you help others in earnest.
Bathe: I tore my meniscus playing basketball and needed orthoscopic surgery to repair it. Part of my recovery regimen was to take baths instead of showers so I could keep my knee out of the tub to keep it dry. To my surprise, the baths were glorious – it was quiet, most of my body was warm, it was relaxing, and I found myself in a meditative state. There was this healing quality about the whole experience, and I vowed to regularly take baths and revisit this sanctuary I unwittingly stumbled across.
Snack and a nap: A very wise person once told me that my mood and perspective can always benefit from a snack and a nap – it changes your perspective. How many times have you been fired up about something and sent a text, email, or tweet that you would later regret? How many items in retrospect would you have gone back and amended what you sent had you had a “do-over”? Create your do-over moment by taking a step back – take a walk, breathe deeply, look up at the sky, and appreciate the moment you are in…and if things are really bad and you can afford to do it, take advantage of the restorative benefits of a snack and a nap.
Journal: Write it down – don’t type it! Help us save an ancient craft known as penmanship through a vehicle called cursive writing. You can pick up free swag like calendars and notepads from various events to use for journaling. You can buy a good journal for under $10. Write daily, even if you are just checking in and describing your 15-minute walk from earlier in the day. Enrich your journal. Save receipts, short articles, tickets, etc. Tape those items in your journal, allowing you to capture the current moment more memorably for future reflection.
Send a letter: Let’s leverage that handwriting skill further and write a letter and send it to a loved one. Even if you are sending it to someone you share a home with, write it and send it to them. It’s nice to get a handwritten piece of mail. It affords the sender the ability to write things they may not always be comfortable saying in person. It shows the recipient that you are thoughtful because you took the time to say something nice to them and you took special care in writing it rather than emailing or texting. It’s a piece they themselves can keep forever and maybe put in their journal.
Make amends: Relationships with family members, co-workers, old friends, and acquaintances may be strained or worse due to the present level of acrimony with all the political polarization, which is further elevated through social media. It does not cost you anything to say: I’m sorry; I forgive you; I was thinking of you; I hope you are well; I regret the past; I see you; I hear you; I value you; forgive me; and I love you. Our hurt, our pride, our fear, our hate, our pain, our anger, our ambivalence, and other feelings can hold us back. Time does not necessarily heal all. Time can sometimes just serve to calcify and harden. Take stock of who you may have hurt and who may have hurt you. Try to forgive those who have hurt you, whether or not they ask for it. Reach out to those you have offended and try to atone and make amends.
Great big belly laugh: Watch your favorite comedy. Watch news bloopers. Watch videos of people accidentally tripping and falling. Tell the story about your crazy aunt or uncle and what they did or said at a wedding. Try out the old saying: “Laughter is the best medicine” and see if it doesn’t make you feel better, in both your body and your mind.
These are all things you can do that are either free or cost very little money. Things that are invaluable to your health and well-being and the health and well-being of others. Practice active listening. Practice being intentional. Practice being in the moment. Be reflective and thankful for the things you have. If you are fortunate to have china or dinnerware, pull it out, use it, enjoy it. Make the here-and-now a special moment.